“Mirror, Mirror On The Wall”

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“Mirror, Mirror On The Wall”

In my era, as a child, we were all fed wonderful fairytales as bedtime stories. Now I do have an opinion about those fairytales but that I will leave for another post…!

Does the wicked queen teach children about discipline and how to manage themselves through good parenting

Remember the Snow White story where the wicked Queen consults with the mirror to tell her the truth? I had a moment where this came to my mind recently…

In life, my desire is to always strive to be a better person – a better mother, a better wife, a better friend, a better ‘me’ in all the roles I manage in my life. One of my favourite sayings is:

“In order to change something, you have to change some-things”

Now, that seems a little strange, right? Read it again – in order to change something, you have to change some-things.

My two boys had been playing really nicely together – I was in an other room but close enough to hear what was going on. Isn’t it the best feeling to be able to listen to your kids getting on well? These guys really were enjoying themselves – they had some game concocted and were right into their play. I don’t know exactly what happened, but the next minute I heard my oldest boy change his tone, and is a loud, gruff voice say, “Stop that right now. If you don’t you will have to finish the game, I’ll count to three…1….2….”

Oh my goodness, I thought. Here he was sounding really mean – what happened to make him switch like that? They were having such a nice time and now he has turned on a dime.

Then the horrible realisation happened…Those were MY words and he was using MY tone of voice –  the exact same tone as I do when I tell them off. Then it hit me – the kids are always learning, learning, learning. And that includes from my actions, tone, manner as well as my words….they are just like a mirror on the wall. In fact, when I am having a bad day, they can be so intuitive that they can respond to that. On the positive side, when I smile, laugh, pay attention to them and play with them, they respond to that too!

So sometimes when we want to change something in our kids behaviour – go look in  the mirror, and start there with the change.

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